Rethinking Infidelity

Why do people cheat? What does it mean to have an affair and be unfaithful? What is really going on in the bigger picture with such incidents? And is it really the worst thing that can happen in a relationship? In my work with couples I have come to realize that affairs are often symptoms of something else happening in the relationship that aren’t getting addressed (i.e. power dynamics, belittling each other, anger and resentment, etc.). Frequently they can happen either due to excessive passive aggression and fear of confrontation over another issue in the relationship, or after little progress has been made to improve upon previously discussed matters. The following TED Talk by Esther Perel provides a new perspective on how to view infidelity:

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